A Riddle For You, Dahling


Here’s a riddle of sorts: An early lunch will be my last meal of the day, I’m looking at a bottle of Magnesium Citrate Oral Solution sitting on my desk, and I’m already feeling a bit anxious. What’s happening tomorrow?

Any takers?

Some of you no doubt have been where I am, planning that same “last meal”, preparing to drink said Magnesium Citrate, feeling similar levels of anxiety.

Well, if you said building a snow man, I’m sorry but you’re wrong.

Going to the dentist? Nope.

Here’s a hint: the full name on the label of my little 10 oz. lemon-flavored cocktail is Mangesium Citrate Oral Solution Saline Laxative.

Ahhh, now you got it. Tomorrow morning I’m having a sigmoidoscopy done. Wonderful day it will be! (Read boucoup sarcasm)

I get a kick out of this oral solution stuff. They try to flavor it but it’s still nasty. I’ve only ever tried the cherry flavored which tastes like you stuffed your mouth with Luden’s cherry cough drops. The lemon should be heavenly. I’m thinking a mouth full of Lemonheads. It’s funny, too, how they market this stuff. On the label it says “The Sparkling Laxative.”

I guess this is the laxative for the rich and cultured: “Here, dahling, have the spahkling laxative.”

Anyway, the anxiety comes not from my sparkling friend staring back at me and looking oh so refreshing but from the test itself. No, I really don’t mind the procedure, the actual sigmoidoscopy. It’s uncomfortable, yes, and totally unnatural, but like I mentioned in an earlier post, compared to chemo it’s a breeze. The anxiety arises from the anticipation of the results of the procedure.

I know I shouldn’t be anxious. Really, I do, but ask any cancer survivor and you’ll find the same emotion surrounding each follow-up test whether it be an MRI, CAT scan, blood work, or infamous sigmoidoscopy. Because we all know the reality is that this monster could come back and hopefully, prayerfully, one of these tests will find it early.

My procedure is at 8:00 tomorrow morning. Tonight, I enjoy my spahkling laxative, dahling.

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About mikedellosso

Mike Dellosso is an author of wide-eyed suspense. He writes stories that not only entertain but enlighten.

Posted on December 21, 2009, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.

  1. Mike, we'll be praying for ya. How come they only do the sig and not the colonoscopy?

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  2. Thanks for the prayers, Beth. They do one of these procedures every four months alternating sigmoidoscopy and colonoscopy. Last time it was supposed to be a sig but wound up being a colonoscopy so this time was scheduled as just a sig. Also, my tumor was in the rectum and chances are, if it's going to come back it'll show up in the same location.

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  3. Will be praying everything is ok tomorrow. I've enjoyed your blog posts – and your books. Looking forward to reading Darlington Woods this coming year – hope you have a Merry Christmas and a New Year full of good health.As for today, hope everything comes out alright 😉

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  4. Thanks for the prayers, Mark, and for putting a smile on my face. I'll have to listen to an evening of "Daddy's in the bathroom again."

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  5. I can relate Mike. Today is my day for a follow up with the Neurologists which I'm sure will be followed up with yet another brain and spine MRI. 2 Hours of laying still in a torpedo tude with an IV and some kind of radioactive whatever in my veins. Then a three hour trip to Kirkland Neurology Clinic in Birmingham for the same thing. Then a call from the first doctor to tell me to keep on doing what I already am. Ain't it fun! Praying for you my friend.

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  6. Praying for you, too, Tim. Hope it all goes well for you.

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  7. Praying for you, Mike!And Tim George….my hubby and I were at Kirkland for a follow-up just this past Friday! Small world!

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  8. Thanks for the prayers, Kim!

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  9. Susan J. Reinhardt

    Hi Mike -Praying for a good report. Isaiah 26:3.Blessings,Susan 🙂

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  10. Julie Arduini.com: The Surrendered Scribe

    Reading this as you are most likely at the appointment. Sending up a prayer.And hopefully to send a smile, I had to drink that stuff and I thought I'd hate it, and I kind of liked it. I had the cherry not just chilled, but almost like a slushie. I wouldn't order it at a restaurant…Merry Christmas and complete and total restoration to your entire family.

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  11. Thanks for the prayers, Julie and Susan. Julie, I hadn't thought of chilling it or slushifying it. I'll keep that in mind.

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  12. I feel for you, Mike. I'm praying for peace, skilled doctor hands, a good report, and grace for every day's needs. Have a blessed Christmas with your family.

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