Time to “Take a Peek”
Tuesday morning I have my routine 4-month sigmoidoscopy, that means Monday evening I’ll be drinking my bottle of magnesium citrate, the “sparkling laxative” and enjoying some quality time in the WC.
I’ve said this before but every time one of these tests take place I get a little anxious. My surgeon acts like it’s no big deal. He says he just needs to “take a peek.” But the whole thing, from the laxative to the early morning appointment to the “gowning up” and lying my side on that hard table to the scope and watching the 60-second tour of my colon gives me the creeps. I know it shouldn’t. I know there’s nothing to worry about. I know this and yet I still fret. The what ifs start rearing their heads and whispering all kinds of things. I try not to listen but they’re very persistent.
So what will I do? Well, what can I do? What can any of us do? Nothing but trust and lean on my faith. I have absolutely no say over what’s going on in my colon, but I do have a say over how I react to it. I can worry and fret and chew my nails to nubs or I can gather this whole ordeal up in my arms and dump it at the feet of Jesus. This is a burden he promised to take. And I’m more than willing to give it to him.